I am fortunate (enough) to have folx in my life who want to be there in nearly equal amounts of how much I want them to be there. No, not from a transactional viewpoint, but an evolutionary one.
My baby sister and a friend both forgot my birthday.
As a former JW (who makes a part of his living on folx’s birthdays), birthdays be complicated. They were, are and will be…hence ‘be’ verb usage, complicated. The evolution, my growth is in the ‘be’.
When my sister and this friend realized that they missed my be-day, they both apologized, in a profusely sweet manner. They were both sincere, and if it’s one thing we Scorpios can sense in our sleep or nighttime with sunglasses on ala Corey Hart who wore his sunglasses at night…it’s sincerity. These two folx both said in their defense: ‘I don’t have Facebook to remind me of ppls birthdays’.
Cool. The fact that they said this independently within 24 hours of each other. I am all over this.
How has social media left us not listening? How much of our communication comes through tone, syntax and general ancestral knowing?
I listen for a living, at the very least, that is what I tell myself.
Would I have liked to have heard from my favorite sister on my be-day? Yes. And. It’s complicated. She has a life. I want to listen to that life. Her life. We had the longest conversation we’ve had in almost a decade last night. Had I been focused on what she hadn’t done on Sunday, I would have missed the richness of our connection. Through shifting the focus on her story about how her dog, Bella, was returned to her, we landmarked. ‘Landmarked’ is my designation for a conversation that emanates a similar energy of a statue. Vows. Promises. Laughter. Above all, laughter. I know and feel my baby sister is ancestrally resilient through her ability to chuckle, trash talk, constructively criticize and LAUGH.
Matter of fact, I sometimes will retell a story (regale) to get her to laugh. If I have little to no success, I use my cross examining leading lawyer like skills to have her tell a story. I interject, irreverently. She has an irreverent spirit. LIke when her stepfather thought that her mother, Daisy brought me into the kitchen to teach me how to cook greens, Angela corrected him. She said, “No, Clarence, Tracy watched Momma make greens. He observed her. She probably liked his company because, ya know, he’s a good conversationalist”. I can see a Clarence shrug (cause he is not a good conversationalist and Angela can be a bit threatening when she starts to cross examine or present direct evidence.)
What I do know because I’ve already experienced it through this week of Listening is I can be good at it. Tooting my own horn is an Aquarian Age concept. No more of this born in ‘original sin’ BS of the Pisces Age that we are leaving. It is less arrogant and more confident when you can present examples of how you’ve served, and served well. I live to serve; I live to listen.
Facebook ain’t got nothing on me and mine.